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T
Curious September 2020 Ontario

Planning the ultimate diy wedding

Trish, on January 21, 2019 at 20:37 Posted in DIY 0 8

Heads up this is going to be obnoxiously long.



To sum it up I’m planning a crazy DIY wedding and will be doing everything from growing my own flowers to making my own fricken dress. Basically I need all the mental and emotional support I can get!



I guess I’m using this post to lay it all out and possibly get feedback on what I may be overlooking and to get advice or any recommendations anyone has!




The date is Sept 26 2020 which is our 10 year anniversary. Couldn’t imagine it on any other day.




We live on a 25 acre farm and we’re building a barn right now that will be the perfect venue. Ceremony outside - weather permitting.



So here’s what I’m hoping to DIY:




•Growing my own flowers (my step sister and grandmother are both florists and will help with the arrangements). I’ve always wanted to have a flower heavy wedding and there’s no way I could afford to buy the amount of flowers I want. Also plan to plant a field of sunflowers for the ceremony backdrop and guest photo booth kinda thing. Will be doing a trial garden this year to prepare better.




•Growing all the veggies! Doing a trial garden to prepare this year.




•Raising all the meat (Pork & chicken)




•Making my own dress (my aunt was a wedding dress maker for 20 years so she’s helping me with that). I’ve already started making a form fitting crocheted lace dress with a removable tulle skirt for the ceremony.




•Growing or making all the favours (either evergreen saplings or wine)




•Future Mother in law will be baking the cake & sweets. She’s an amazing baker.




•Future sister in law is an amazing makeup artists and I wouldn’t have anyone else do my makeup. Her best friend will be doing my hair most likely.




•I’m a furniture maker so doing the decor is going to be super fun and right up my alley.




Things I’m on the fence about DIYing or hiring out:




  • • Catering. I’ve spoken to a local caterer who is willing to work with the ingredients I provide. It’s still hella expensive though. Other possible option is paying my cousin who is a recent chef school grad and a couple of his school friends to do the cooking. Other other option is to have the menu items divided up between my family members and just hire someone to do the bbq and serve buffet day of.

  • •Music. My FH is a musician and music is obviously a huge thing for us. Considering doing a playlist and having a friend MC. On the fence about a band but if we do go that route he has hundreds of band friends he can ask. Also on the fence about a DJ. I’ve only heard negative things about wedding DJs from friends and that just puts me off.

  • •Tableware. Better to rent fancy cutlery and plates or just buy the fancy looking plastic stuff?

  • •Have a bartender or do a self serve bar?



Where we have to hire out:


  • •Photographer (considering using a couple photography students but this might be risky)

  • •Videographer (also considering students)

  • •Midnight seafood buffet (I’m half Portuguese and it’s my fave tradition at weddings)


  • •Officiant (I want to have a friend of ours do the ceremony and have an officiant to do the signing)


  • •Day of coordinator

  • What else? What am I forgetting? What do you wish you saved on or spent more on? What were your fave DIYs? Am I crazy?

8 Comments

Latest activity by Karine, on February 6, 2019 at 19:11
  • K
    Frequent user August 2024 Quebec
    Karine ·
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    Also, I know in Quebec of you send a request to the gov. and/or church, they can make someone you know an officiant for your wedding only... I think there are some costs and the person has some rules to follow (of course) but maybe you can look into that?

    Pictures and video... Talk to the teachers/head of photography program... Ask them if they'd recommend a student and then ask the students to see their portfolios of they are interested... Don't forget to have a list of all the shots you want to give the photographer!

    Good luck, and don't stress too much! Even if the flowers or food or whatever don't turn out the way you want, remember that you're still getting married to the person you love!
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  • K
    Frequent user August 2024 Quebec
    Karine ·
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    The bar... If I were you I'd hire someone... They usually know how to deal with drunk people (I hope it doesn't happen to you but people can get really drunk) plus your guests won't refill as often as they won't want to be judged by the bartender... I've already seen someone drunk ruin the wedding by calling the bride the b word and telling her she was going to "get divorced soon anyways"
    So, not to sound alarmist but, I'd hire a bartender! Smiley smile
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  • Vinod
    Top August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    Your on a role and got a handy family to help with many things your planned for your day.

    Catering can be a pot luck style so that your guests don't have any issues bringing food to cut down the cost of your cousin doing all the work. Plus its easy to have a self serve vs. spending on people serving.

    Bar tender would be a good idea especially since you know that some guests may put more liquor in their drinks. I wouldn't say otherwise if you could afford that much more booze to keep on the table for self serve.

    Music is settled if your good with the song list choices you both put together.

    Videographer is good for a student to put on their work for their program, though you should see a sample of their work to be up to the professional level. I know they are a great saving for what they get paid for their services. Some things may be to good to be true.

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  • Jennifer
    Super July 2019 Ontario
    Jennifer ·
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    Catering - i would hire out. as much as your cousin may be great. if they don't have experience with large guests lists. it could be overwhelming for them. and this is one thing i also don't think you should put on family

    hire a bartender - someone that is experienced and smart serve certified (also take out PAL insurance...its liquor liability insurance. usually around 250). this way if someone does something stupid, you are covering your butt

    and hire a DJ or band - they are experienced at keeping a crowd pumped, and finding the right music etc.

    your guests will remember food/music/bar. you do those right. you have your photos as memories. you do those right Smiley smile

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  • Allison
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Allison ·
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    I think if you keep up the ambition and drive to do all the DIY you can definitely pull it off!! I haven't been to a wedding that was super DIY'd like the one your describing, but there's been a few ideas I might be able to provide insight too!

    Photography might not have to be some thing that's hired out, same with videography! You could go the student route, but if you know someone with a good camera and a knack for photography, you could approach them and ask!

    I like the idea of having your musician friends contribute to the playlist, but also have a playlist on Spotify or something!

    Your culinary school cousin and his friends would probably be great at cooking your feast and will probably cost way less than a caterer.

    For the bar, it really depends on how big your wedding is/what people drink. Our family has done backyard parties of up to 50 people with a self-serve bar. We had a few types of beer, red and white wine, and different types of coolers (palm bays, mike's etc). Anything more would be getting too much and I would probably hire a bartender at that point.

    Renting tableware is definitely more environmentally friendly, but we've done paper plates and threw them in the bonfire when you were done eating lol.


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  • Tori
    Top October 2019 Manitoba
    Tori ·
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    Catering: I would go with the option of hiring your cousin and their friends from culinary school

    Music: DJ's are awesome - but if I could afford a band (they are like double in price), then I would go with a band! Just make sure they know the key songs for your wedding, as well as songs that everybody dances to!!

    Tableware: Might be best to rent - then you don't even have to worry about cleaning the plates and utensils at the end of the night, they just get sent back dirty! (I'm against any plastic plates that would go to the landfill so that option I advise against.)

    Bartender: Depends on if you have heavy drinkers in your families. If we left it up to our families we would be broke as they would get a beer, leave it, and go help themselves to another Smiley tongue

    As for your hire-outs that are inevitable -

    Photographer(s): Students can surprise you!! Definitely do a trial run by taking some engagement photo's perhaps? But overall you should be fine. If anything ask your guests to take as many pictures and videos as they want just in case your photographers miss something or it's blurry or whatever (which I doubt, but you never can be too careful!).

    Videographer(s): Same thing as for photographers, just maybe don't ask your guests to pull out their phones during the ceremony so that you don't get pictures and videos of people on their phones recording...

    Seafood Buffet: Ya, no getting around the cost of that either :/ Only thing I could suggest is buying frozen for best cost maybe? When cooked right you can't tell it's not fresh!

    Officiant: It's fairly cheap to get ordained online - you may just have to pay the wedding license fee and the "ordainment" fee which tends to cost less in the long run (I've seen officiants wanting to charge like $500...

    DOC: Useful, but if you have a smaller wedding or have it under control you don't need to spend $1000 on something like this. It mostly helps with outside catering anyways which you won't have much of if at all.

    Also, no - you're not crazy! If I could do half of what you are doing I would at least entertain the idea!! lol Congrats on the engagement by the way!!

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  • T
    Curious September 2020 Ontario
    Trish ·
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    Thanks Leah! It IS crazy ambitions. The only reason I believe i can pull this off is the fact that I work from home and have a lot of free time to be able to put into this AND I have so many family members in the wedding business. If the trail gardens don’t go to plan this year I’ll have plenty of time to book backups but I think with the amount we’ve grown in the past we just have to amp it up a bit and somehow try to time harvest or preserve things for a few weeks. I’m going to start vlogging about it as soon as I start my sends in the next few weeks. So I’ll def keep everyone here updated
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  • Leah
    VIP April 2019 British Columbia
    Leah ·
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    This is SUPER ambitious, but totally doable! I would imagine the key is to have multiple back up plans, and be intuitive enough to go with the flow when things don't go exactly as planned. I'm so excited for you, and hope that you'll keep us posted throughout your process.

    I like the idea of doing your own playlist, having a friend MC and having your musician friends contribute as well - it works bc music is a a huge deal for you both.

    I would choose a bartender over self-serve, get fun/fancy affordable cutlery if the budget allows, and work with your cousin and his chef buddies to curate the wedding feast of your dreams.

    Consider working with a local goldsmith/art school to make your own rings.

    I love the idea of DIY's, but I mostly observe and ooh and ahh from the sidelines.

    You've got plenty of time to make this all work. Congratulations on your engagement! Welcome to the Wedding Wire community!

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